Five memos Jack never read
Participation is open to all. If this is your own prompt, you're free to write to it (please do!). Post your list as a comment to this post, adding additional comments if you exceed the character limit. It's OK to post as Anonymous, then come out later or not as you choose. Responses will be screened until April 27 to see what people come up with independently. You can still respond to the prompt after the April 27 unveiling.
General info and a place to ask questions: the comm 'welcome' post.
Technical-support questions: tech help.
Suggestions: the suggestion box.
To supply a new prompt: the open call for prompts.
Subject-line spoiler warnings for late-season SGA eps and the SG-1 movies, thanks!
April 27 is the official due date. If you're posting a response after the unveiling announcement on April 27, please copy the link to your comment, click on the 'set 69' tag, and reply to the post 'Set 69 Responses Unscreened' with the link to your new comment-response. That helps people find and read and comment on responses that weren't there when they cruised through right after the reveal. Pimp the link in your journal, too, if you want to let your flist know you've posted something new.
Participation is open to all. If this is your own prompt, you're free to write to it (please do!). Post your list as a comment to this post, adding additional comments if you exceed the character limit. It's OK to post as Anonymous, then come out later or not as you choose. Responses will be screened until April 27 to see what people come up with independently. You can still respond to the prompt after the April 27 unveiling.
General info and a place to ask questions: the comm 'welcome' post.
Technical-support questions: tech help.
Suggestions: the suggestion box.
To supply a new prompt: the open call for prompts.
Subject-line spoiler warnings for late-season SGA eps and the SG-1 movies, thanks!
April 27 is the official due date. If you're posting a response after the unveiling announcement on April 27, please copy the link to your comment, click on the 'set 69' tag, and reply to the post 'Set 69 Responses Unscreened' with the link to your new comment-response. That helps people find and read and comment on responses that weren't there when they cruised through right after the reveal. Pimp the link in your journal, too, if you want to let your flist know you've posted something new.
Tags:
From:
no subject
"O’Neill, I do not see how Bart could so easily misjudge the width of the gorge. A boy of his age would do well to challange his enemy Nelson to Kalok’ne so that he may go first and prove to himself how wide the gorge indeed is. – Teal’c"
"Sir, jello is not an acceptable gift for the people of P3X-597, their physiology is slightly different from ours, and it appears they’ve been on a sugar high since Tuesday. – Sam"
"Colonel, you left your reading material in my infirmary again.
I’ve taken ‘Highland Passions’ home for the night as I was thumbing through it on my break, and I want to see how it ends.
Do you think Thorn is the father of Eileen’s baby?"
"Att: Col. Jonathan J. O’Neill USAF
Message received: 0325 March 24th 2000
Origin: P5C-768 (Edora)
Message reads:
It’s a girl."
"Jack, I’ve thought about it, and the answer is yes. Meet you for a beer when we get home from Kelowna. – Daniel"
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
Great format to do the fic in.
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:From:
no subject
Loved these - especially the format and different "handwriting" (fonts?). :D
(no subject)
From:From:
no subject
(no subject)
From:From:
no subject
lol.
snorfle.
sniffle.
ow.
Nicely done, graphically and "vocally".
From:
no subject
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:From:
no subject
From:
no subject
#3 utterly cracks me up, #4 is a total "Whoa!", and #5... eep! It's probably just as well that Jack didn't see that one. Anyway, Daniel will tell him in person, eventually. :-)
From:
Five Memos Jack Never Read
2. The memo to everyone stationed at the SGC announcing the transfer of Major Samuels to the Pentagon, effective immediately, and the appointment of Colonel O’Neill as General Hammond’s Second in Command. Jack was just back from Argos, and his rheumy elderly eyes would not allow him to read it when Daniel thrust it at him. The admitting to less-than-perfect eyesight is a touchy subject for flyboys, and General Hammond, recognizing this, took the paper from Jack’s tremulous and seamed hands, and read it to Jack himself. It certainly gave his officer something to look forward to as soon as his youth (or at least the last vestiges of it) returned.
3. The memo Sam Carter intended to submit, requesting separation from the Air Force and a position in the labs. After he walked away from her explanation of how she’d created the particle generator to invite Laira to return with him, she had sworn not to let her feelings for any man interfere with her career, ever again. If love and romance came, well good, but she wasn’t looking for them, and she was definitely making her career priority number one. She tore the memo into tiny shreds, and threw it in the shredder for good measure. Like all trash in the facility, it was incinerated.
4. That one about the powers of the CMO never existed, but he had thrown out a memo earlier in the week (from the officer in charge of parking at Norad, requesting that all vehicles that were to remain in the lot for periods longer than six days be tagged and keys left with his office for re-parking in the distant shuttle lots to make room for those in daily use) without having read it, because a bit of icing from a mid-morning cake pick-me-up had fallen on another memo, and the two got stuck together and he never noticed the second memo underneath the first.
5. The hand written memo from the President of the United States, personally delivered by the President himself, requesting that Jack put off his retirement for an additional two years. Jack could tell just by the man’s expression what it was, and God knew he’d had enough phone calls from him and his minions about the subject. He snatched it from the President’s surprised fingers before the Secret Service even had a chance to react, and ripped it up on the spot.
“No!” Jack said firmly. “No way!...sir. I promised Carter. I promised.”
The President – to the vast surprise of the others in the room, with the probable exception of Jack O’Neill – gave a somewhat sheepish grin, and shrugged his shoulders.
“I had to try,” he said.
Later Jack kind of regretted being so dramatic about it. Even that shrub's signature could be valuable one day.
Edited to restore an ommitted word
From:
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
From:From:
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
Great list!
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
From:From:
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
I totally believe that many memos Jack swore he never got were actually stuck to the back of another memo by a bit of cake icing. :-D
Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
From:Re: Five Memos Jack Never Read
From:From:
Five memos Jack never read
The one where Daniel asked him, none too politely, to at least skim through his reports before they went into a briefing, because he was tired of having to stop in the middle of a sentence, numberless times, to answer Jack’s inane questions that would have been unnecessary if Jack would at the very least bother to skim through his reports; and was that really too much to ask?
The one where Daniel advised him that in future he would be attaching a bullet point summary to each report that he sent to Jack; one using very small words that a child of meager understanding could understand, and if Jack needed help finding such a child to help him interpret these documents Daniel would be more than happy to oblige. Anything for his Commanding Officer. The words ‘commanding officer’ were underlined, italicized and bolded in such a way that even a Commanding Officer of meager understanding would have perceived the sarcasm. If he had bothered to read the memo.
The memo from Sam that contained the information, hidden in extremely formal and round-about terminology, that one of Colonel O’Neill’s team members was a trifle unhappy and that something perhaps needed to be done before said team member… here the language grew so vague that it was unclear exactly what action she was fearing on the part of this unnamed team member.
The memo Teal’c sent was much more to the point:
O’Neill. I believe that your life is in danger.
Jack really, really should have read that one.
From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Jack has to be the most infuriating "Commanding Officer" of all time... I just hope he finds some way to make it up to Daniel.
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
To: Maj.Gen. George S. Hammond, SGC, Commanding
At 0817 today I was summoned to the office of Dr. Daniel Jackson by Capt. Carter, where I and my men were forced to subdue Dr. Jackson, who was attempting to pierce Col. O'Neill with a dagger [said to be of 18th Dynasty Egyptian design] brought back from PX3-396. Dr. Jackson appeared to be enraged and was shouting about memos and the necessity that Col. O'Neill prove that he was able to read. We subdued him, and confiscated the dagger, and eight similar implements, and at that point, Col. O'Neill said that our services were no longer needed. He stated that "What happens in SG-1 stays in SG-1, right, Daniel?" However, I felt you should be informed, in case there are further developments.
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
Re: Five memos Jack never read
Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:Re: Five memos Jack never read
From:From:
no subject